240 Hilariously Funny Kids Jokes

Prepare for laughter overload: these silly kids' jokes will make them ROFL!


tali ditye author mommyhood101  By: Tali Ditye, Ph.D., Co-founder
  Updated: July 29, 2023

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We pulled together 240 of the funniest kids' jokes we could find!

From jokes about school, food, and animals, to hilarious wisecracks about the seasons and holidays, these silly kids' jokes are sure to get them rolling on the floor laughing!

Also, be sure to check out these riddles for kids and our list would you rather questions for kids!


Hilarious Kids Jokes

  • Why did the scarecrow win an award?  Because he was outstanding in his field!
  • Why don't scientists trust atoms?  Because they make up everything!
  • Why don't skeletons fight each other?  They don't have the guts!
  • What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?  An abdominal snowman!
  • Why don't bicycles stand up on their own?  They're two-tired!
  • Why was the math book sad?  It had too many problems!
  • What's brown and sticky?  A stick!
  • What's a pirate's favorite letter?  Arrrrr!
  • How do you make a tissue dance?  Put a little boogie in it!
  • What did one ocean say to the other ocean?  Nothing, they just waved!
  • What did one hat say to the other hat?  You stay here, I'll go on ahead!
  • Why was the computer cold?  It left its Windows open!
  • Why was the broom late?  It overswept!
  • Why do we never tell secrets on a farm?  Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears!
  • Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?  In case he got a hole in one!
  • Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?  It was two-tired!
  • How does a train eat?  It goes chew chew!
  • Why did the math book look sad?  Because it had too many problems!
  • What kind of shoes do spies wear?  Sneakers!
  • What did one plate say to another plate?  Dinner is on me!
  • What did one wall say to the other wall?  I'll meet you at the corner!
  • What did one elevator say to the other elevator?  I think I'm coming down with something!
  • Why did the computer go to the doctor?  It had a virus!
  • Why don't some couples go to the gym?  Because some relationships don't work out!
  • Why did the bicycle fall over?  Because it was two-tired!
  • Why did the scarecrow become a successful politician?  Because he was outstanding in his field!
  • What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?  Frostbite with a hint of garlic!
  • What did the blanket say to the bed?  "Don't worry, I've got you covered!"
  • How do you organize a space party?  You "planet" it in advance!
  • What did the ocean say to the beach?  "Wave" hello!
kids jokes about animals

Funny Kids Jokes about Animals

  • What's a frog's favorite candy?  Lollihops!
  • What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?  A thesaurus!
  • What do you call a bear with no teeth?  A gummy bear!
  • What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?  A dino-snore!
  • How do you catch a squirrel?  Climb up a tree and act like a nut!
  • What do you call a fly without wings?  A walk!
  • What do you call a pig that knows karate?  Pork chop!
  • Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?  Because they lactose!
  • What do you call a fish wearing a crown?  King of the sea!
  • What's a cow's favorite instrument?  The moo-sical!
  • What do you call a fish with no eyes?  Fsh!
  • Why don't some fish play piano?  Because you can't find the right scale!
  • How do you catch a squirrel on a skateboard?  With a "nuts and bolts" trap!
  • What did one hat say to the other hat?  "You stay here, I'll go on ahead! Hats off to you!"
  • Why was the belt arrested?  It was "holding up" a pair of pants!
  • How do you catch a unique rabbit?  You "neak up" on it!
  • What do you call a sleeping bull?  A "bull-dozer" catching some Z's!
  • What do you call a dog magician?  A "labracadabrador"!
  • What's orange and sounds like a parrot?  A "carrot" repeating everything!
  • What do you call fake fruit?  "Unreal" apples and oranges!
  • How do you catch a unique bird?  You "nique up" on it!
  • Why don't some fish play piano?  You can't "tuna" piano, but you can tuna fish!
  • What did one shoe say to the other shoe?  "I'm "tying" to stay on!"
  • Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?  To "go up" in grades!
  • What do you call a sleeping bull with a dream?  A "bull dreamer"!
  • Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?  Because they "lack toes"!
  • What did the left eye say to the right eye?  Between you and me, "something smells"!
  • What's a banana's favorite dance?  The "split"!
  • Why do bees have sticky hair?  Because they use honeycombs!
  • What's a cat's favorite color?  Purr-ple!
  • Why did the chicken go to the seance?  To talk to the other side!
  • Why do hummingbirds hum?  Because they don't know the words!
  • What do you call a deer with no eyes?  No-eye deer!
  • What do you get when you cross a dog and a phone?  A golden receiver!
  • How do you communicate with a fish?  You drop it a line!
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    kids jokes about food

    Funny Kids Jokes about Food

  • What do you call a shoe made of a banana?  A slipper!
  • What's orange and sounds like a parrot?  A carrot!
  • Why did the tomato turn red?  Because it saw the salad dressing!
  • Why don't eggs tell jokes?  They might crack up!
  • How do you fix a broken tomato?  Tomato paste!
  • Why don't eggs ever tell jokes?  Because they might crack up!
  • How does a cucumber become a pickle?  It goes through a jarring experience!
  • What's a banana's favorite dance?  The split!
  • What do you call fake spaghetti?  An "impasta" trying to be linguini!
  • What do you call a shoe made of a banana?  A "slip-peel"!
  • Why did the tomato become a successful comedian?  Because it knew how to "ketchup" with the audience!
  • Why did the apple go to school?  To get "a little biter" at math!
  • Why did the baker go broke?  He kneaded the dough!
  • What do you call an egg that likes to tell jokes?  An "egg-citing" comedian!
  • Why did the carrot go to the party?  Because it was a "rootin' tootin'" good time!
  • How do you fix a broken pizza?  With tomato paste!
  • Why was the vegetable so good at math?  Because it knew how to count its peas!
  • What do you call a burger with great karma?  An "enlightened beef" patty!
  • Why did the bread go to school?  To be "butter" educated!
  • How do you make an octopus laugh?  Give it ten "tickles"!
  • Why did the cookie cry?  Because its mom was a "wafer" too long!
  • What do you call an alligator in a vest?  An investigator!
  • Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road?  Because it ran out of juice!
  • What do you call a cake that's not yours?  "Stolen" cake!
  • Why did the apple stop in the middle of the road?  It ran out of juice!
  • Why did the vegetable go to the art exhibit?  To "turnip" the creativity!
  • kids jokes about school

    Funny Kids Jokes about School & Homework

  • Why did the pencil go to school?  To get sharper!
  • Why did the teacher go to the beach?  To test the waters!
  • Why did the student take a ladder to school?  Because they wanted to go to high school!
  • Why did the student wear glasses in math class?  To improve "division" skills!
  • Why was the clock always hungry in school?  It went back four seconds!
  • Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?  Because her students were so bright!
  • Why did the music teacher go to jail?  For dropping a beat!
  • Why did the student sit on an apple?  He wanted to be a "smart"ie!
  • Why did the textbook go to therapy?  It had too many issues!
  • Why was the student's report card wet?  It was below C-level!
  • Why did the student wear sunglasses to school?  To cover up their "A" grades!
  • Why did the principal become an artist?  He loved drawing "conclusions"!
  • Why did the student break up with the calculator?  It had too many "problems"!
  • Why did the teacher go to outer space?  To find new ways to "inspire" the students!
  • Why was the geometry book sad?  Because it had too many angles to deal with!
  • Why did the book go to the nurse's office?  It had too many characters!
  • Why did the teacher go to the beach?  To get a little "shore" leave!
  • Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?  To go to high school!
  • Why did the teacher bring a ladder to school?  To reach the high notes!
  • Why did the history book get a bad grade?  It had too many dates to remember!
  • Why did the biology book always win in sports?  It had the best "cells"!
  • Why did the school cafeteria serve the internet?  Because they heard it had great "connections"!
  • Why did the teacher go to the beach?  To catch some "rays" of knowledge!
  • Why did the student wear a coat in the classroom?  Because the teacher said the test would be "chilly"!
  • Why did the math book look sad?  Because it had too many "problems" to solve!
  • Why was the pencil always tired?  Because it did a lot of "writing" exercises!
  • Why did the paper visit the doctor?  It was feeling "sheet" sick from too much homework!
  • Why did the teacher go to the beach instead of grading homework?  Because she needed to "shore" up her energy!
  • Why did the ghost refuse to do its homework?  It couldn't "ghoul" through all the assignments!
  • Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?  To "climb" over all the homework and escape!
  • Why did the student eat their homework?  The teacher said it was a "piece of cake"!
  • Why did the history book hide from the homework?  It was afraid of facing its "past" mistakes!
  • Why did the spelling book go to the gym?  To work on its "word" strength for homework!
  • Why did the notebook refuse to do its math homework?  It didn't want to "multiply" its problems!
  • Why did the student wear sunglasses while doing homework?  To shade the "bright" ideas!
  • Why did the geography book get in trouble?  It couldn't find its way through the "world" of homework!
  • Why did the dictionary refuse to help with homework?  It said, "I can't handle all these definitions!"
  • Why did the homework assignment go to the beach?  To "seashell" its knowledge with friends!
  • Why did the student's backpack have a bad day?  It was carrying a heavy "load" of homework!
  • Why did the paper clip never get bored with homework?  It had a "grip" on the situation!
  • Why did the book stay up all night to finish homework?  It wanted to "cover" all the chapters!
  • Why did the report card go to the doctor?  It had too many "grades" of pain from homework stress!
  • Why did the math homework go to the circus?  To find the "mean" lion tamer!
  • Why did the homework cry?  Because the student wrote too many "tear-able" puns!
  • kids jokes about summer

    Funny Kids Jokes about Summer

    • What did the ocean say to the beach during summer?  Nothing, it just waved!
    • Why do bees stay in their hives during summer?  They don't want to get too "buzz-y"!
    • What did one hat say to the other hat during summer?  You stay here, I'll go on ahead to find some shade!
    • Why did the boy bring a ladder to the beach during summer?  To catch some "rays" of sunshine!
    • What do you call a snowman in summer?  A "puddle" of melted happiness!
    • Why did the computer go to the beach during summer?  To surf the internet!
    • What do you call a summer vegetable that loves to tell jokes?  A "corny" comedian!
    • Why do bicycles fall asleep during summer?  Because they're "tired" of all the riding!
    • What do you get when you cross a dog and a summer flower?  A "collie"flower!
    • Why did the boy sprinkle sugar on his pillow during summer?  To have "sweet" dreams of vacation!
    • Why did the girl bring a fan to the park during summer?  To "breeze" through her day!
    • What do you call a fish during the summer?  A "sun"-fish!
    • Why did the ice cream go to school during summer?  To "chill" out with friends!
    • What did the ice cream say to the sun?  "You're melting my heart!"
    • What do you call a beach ball during summer?  A "fun"-ball!
    • Why did the little tree want to skip summer camp?  It was afraid of getting "barked" at by other trees!
    • What do you call a shoe during summer?  A "flip-flop"!
    kids jokes about winter

    Funny Kids Jokes about Winter

    • Why do birds fly south in the winter?  It's too far to walk!
    • Why did the snowman go to school?  To get a little "flakier"!
    • What did the snowflake say to the other snowflake?  "You're one of a kind!"
    • Why did the girl bring a ladder to the ice rink?  To skate on the "cool" level!
    • How do snowmen get around?  They "brrrr-oom" their way!
    • Why did the boy bring a pencil to the winter playground?  To sketch some "cool" snow art!
    • Why did the snowman become a famous singer?  He had the "coolest" voice in town!
    • Why did the snowman go to the party?  Because he was really "cool" and loved to "chill"!
    • How does a snowman get to work?  By "icicle" carpool!
    • What do you call a snowman party?  A "snowball"!
    • Why was the snowman staring at the calendar?  He was counting the "flake-out" days left in winter!
    • What did one snowman say to the other snowman?  "Do you smell carrots
    • Why did the girl bring an umbrella to the snowstorm?  She heard it was "flurry-ing" outside!
    • What did the snowman eat for breakfast?  Frosted "flakes"!
    • How do you catch a snowflake?  With a snowball "net"!
    • Why did the snowman go to school?  To get "schooled" on winter fun!
    • What's a snowman's favorite dessert?  Ice cream, of course!
    • Why did the snowman want to be an artist?  He loved creating "snow-cials"!

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    kids jokes about spring

    Funny Kids Jokes about Spring

    • Why did the bee go to school in the spring?  To learn how to "bee-have" around flowers!
    • How do flowers greet each other in the spring?  "Hey bud, how's it blooming
    • What do you call a sheep during spring?  A "spring-wool"!
    • How do you fix a broken spring?  With "spring-tape"!
    • What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a spring flower?  A "hop-tulip"!
    • Why did the girl bring a ladder to the park during spring?  To reach the "highlights" of the season!
    • What do you call a happy frog in the spring?  A "spring-peeper"!
    • Why did the chicken lay eggs in the spring?  Because it was an "egg-citing" time of year!
    • What do you call a bear during spring cleaning?  A "dust-bear"!
    • How do you catch a squirrel in the spring?  Climb a tree and "branch" out to find it!
    • Why was the dictionary so excited during spring?  It added some "blossom-ing" new words!
    • What's a spring flower's favorite music genre?  "Tulip" hop!
    • Why did the sunflower blush during spring?  It saw the other flowers "petal-ing" each other!
    • What did the tree say to the flower during spring?  "What's up, bud
    • Why did the squirrel start a band during spring?  It wanted to play "acorn"-ic music!
    • What do you call a baby chick in the spring?  A "spring-chicken"!
    • Why did the butterfly throw a party during spring?  It wanted to celebrate its "meta-morphosis"!
    kids jokes about autumn

    Funny Kids Jokes about Fall

    • What do you call a tree that has a lot of money in the fall?  A "cashew" tree!
    • Why do leaves always hang out together in the fall?  Because they can't "leaf" each other!
    • What did one leaf say to another in the fall?  "I'm falling for you!"
    • Why was the math book sad in the fall?  It had too many "problems" to solve!
    • How do you fix a broken leaf in the fall?  With "leaf" glue!
    • Why did the girl bring a ladder to the pumpkin patch in the fall?  To pick out the "highlights" of the season!
    • What did one autumn leaf say to another?  "I'm falling for you head over heels!"
    • Why was the calendar so popular in the fall?  It had all the "dates" everyone needed!
    • How do trees get on the internet in the fall?  They log in!
    • What do you call a pumpkin that complains a lot in the fall?  A "grumpkin"!
    • What do you call a haunted house in the fall?  A "spook-tacular" mansion!
    • Why did the boy bring a broom to the pumpkin patch in the fall?  To "sweep" up the best pumpkins!
    • What did the autumn leaf say to the wind?  "I'm "falling" for you, let's dance!"
    • Why was the school book so sad in the fall?  It was "leaf"-t behind by the students!
    • How do you fix a broken pumpkin in the fall?  With a "pumpkin patch"!
    • What's a scarecrow's favorite fruit in the fall?  Straw-berries!
    • Why did the apple tree get in trouble in the fall?  It couldn't "leaf" school early!
    kids jokes about christmas

    Funny Kids Jokes about Christmas and Santa

    • Why did Santa go to music school?  To improve his "wrapping" skills!
    • What do you call an elf who sings?  A wrapper!
    • Why was the Christmas tree so bad at knitting?  It kept dropping its needles!
    • What did the gingerbread man use to fix his house?  Icing and gumdrops!
    • What do you get if you cross a snowman and a dog?  Frostbite!
    • Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?  Because it soot-s him!
    • Why did the ornament go to school?  To get "tinsel-lectual"!
    • What do you call a cat on the beach during Christmas?  Sandy Claws!
    • Why does Santa always go down the chimney?  Because it soot-s him best!
    • What do you call Santa when he takes a break?  Santa Pause!
    • Why did the Christmas cookie go to the doctor?  It was feeling "crumby"!
    • What do you call a reindeer that tells jokes?  A "comet"-ian!
    • Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?  Because he had a low "elf"-esteem!
    • How does Santa keep his suit wrinkle-free?  He uses Claus-tarch!
    • What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire?  Frostbite with a hint of garlic!
    • What do elves use to take notes in school?  Elf-abet soup!
    • How do you know if Santa's been using your computer?  There will be "cookies" everywhere!
    • Why did Santa go to the doctor?  He was "feeling a little Claus-trophobic"!
    • Why do Christmas trees like knitting?  Because they are good at "purling"!
    • What did Santa say to the smoker?  Please don't smoke, it's bad for my "elf"!
    kids jokes about birthdays

    Funny Kids Jokes about Birthdays

    • Why did the birthday cake go to school?  To get a "batter" education!
    • What do you get when you cross a birthday cake and a pie?  A "party" in your mouth!
    • Why did the candle go to school?  To learn how to "sparkle" in the dark!
    • What did one birthday candle say to the other?  "Don't be so wick-ed, let's have a blast!"
    • Why was the math book sad on its birthday?  It had too many "problems" to solve!
    • What do you call a monkey that loves birthdays?  A "bananarama"!
    • Why do candles never tell jokes at birthday parties?  They always get "burned" by the punchline!
    • What do you get when you cross a birthday cake and a vegetable?  A zucchini candle!
    • Why was the birthday present always late?  It took too many "wraps" around the world!
    • What did the balloon say to the birthday cake?  "You take the cake, and I'll fly high!"
    • What do you get if you cross a dinosaur and a birthday cake?  "Jurassic" party fun!
    • Why did the girl bring a ladder to her birthday party?  To "climb" to new heights of fun!
    • What's a cake's favorite instrument?  The "trombone" for a happy birthday song!
    • Why did the teddy bear refuse to attend the birthday party?  It was too "un-bear-able"!
    • What did the birthday candle say to the cake?  "Don't worry, I'm here to "lighten" the mood!"
    • Why was the calendar always excited about its birthday?  It had all the "dates" marked!
    • What's a balloon's favorite part of a birthday party?  The "air"-raising excitement!
    • Why do candles always enjoy birthday parties?  They can't wait to "burn" up the dance floor!
    • What do you get when you cross a birthday cake and a snowman?  Frosting-covered snowflakes!

    cradlewise smart crib

    kids jokes about hanukkah

    Funny Kids Jokes about Hanukkah

    • What's a dreidel's favorite type of music?  "Spin"-spirational songs!
    • Why did the candle go to school?  To get "lit"erature lessons!
    • Why did the potato latke go on a diet?  It wanted to be a "light" snack!
    • What do you call a snowman with a menorah?  A "melt"-in-your-heart holiday symbol!
    • Why did the menorah get a job at the bakery?  It loved "lighting" up people's lives with doughnuts!
    • What did one candle say to the other during Hanukkah?  "You're the "wick"-iest friend ever!"
    • What do you call a funny candle during Hanukkah?  A "wick"-tastic comedian!
    • Why was the dreidel always so happy?  Because it had the "spin" of a lifetime!
    • What's a snowman's favorite holiday?  "Chill"-ukah!
    • Why did the menorah have to see the dentist?  It had a "cavity" problem!
    • How do you greet a potato latke during Hanukkah?  "A-peeling" to meet you!
    • What did the dreidel say to the kids during Hanukkah?  "Let's have a "spin"-tastic time!"
    • Why did the candles start a band during Hanukkah?  They wanted to "burn" up the charts!
    • What's a potato latke's favorite Hanukkah carol?  "Oh Fry-lid Night"!
    • Why did the menorah go to school?  To learn "light"-saber skills!
    • What do you call a snowman with a menorah on its head?  A "melt"-inorah!
    • How do you make a dreidel smile?  Give it a "spin"-tastic joke!
    • What's a candle's favorite dessert during Hanukkah?  "Wick"-leberry pie!
    • Why did the potato latke go to the gym during Hanukkah?  To get "s-fry"-t and healthy!
    • What do you get when you cross a dreidel and a computer?  A "spin"-ning cursor!
    • Why was the menorah so good at math?  It could "count" the candles perfectly!
    • What do you call a dancing potato latke?  The "Cha-Cha-Chanukah" tater!
    • Why did the candle go to the party during Hanukkah?  It wanted to be the "light" of the celebration!
    • How does a snowman celebrate Hanukkah?  With "freez-leykhs" and holiday cheer!
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